In 2021, we were delighted to share a blog post all about Ridley – our founder Chrissa’s daughter and someone who has a diagnosis of DLD.
In the run-up to our new DLD webinar hosted by Speech and Language expert Libby Hill, which is taking place on 13 February, we are looking back at what Ridley shared with us in 2021 and getting an update on how she is doing three years later.
If you need more info on DLD, then do take a look at our webinar and book on if this will be of interest to you: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/1001260165107
Ridley and Chrissa have also recently done at Facebook Live chatting through how life is now. You can watch it here: https://www.youtube.com/live/EUvw2_CjPvw?feature=shared
Ridley in 2021…
Ridley is a twin and had a tough time in utero. Her speech was slightly delayed and she was later than her twin with successful toilet training, which affected her confidence as some of her nursery teachers would often point this out to her and compare her to her sister.
Her nursery teachers also noticed what they called ‘naughty’ behaviours when she ‘didn’t get her own way’. We didn’t notice this at home.
To give some context, we are a neurodivergent family. Within our brood we have Dyslexia, Developmental Trauma, ADHD, Autism, PDA to name a few. Our home is a sensory haven, no matter the profile of the child, and we are naturally trauma-responsive with our approaches.
Naturally, when environments did not meet Ridley’s needs the way we did at home then there were behaviours that presented themselves, those ‘behaviours’ were actually responses to her needs not being met and not the sign of a ‘naughty child’ (there is no such thing as a naughty child!).
We assumed that the reason she wasn’t performing to the standard that nursery teachers expected was because of this environmental difference and also the fact she’s a twin and the youngest in her year group. However, when she progressed to school we learned so much more.
Ridley’s early signs of DLD
Ridley had an amazing reception teacher who really understood her. It wasn’t long before we were invited in for a chat about her progress and possible special educational needs. The things that were identified at this early stage were:
- Difficulties being in a busy class of 30
- Difficulties transitioning between tasks and settings
- Disappearing into areas where she couldn’t be spotted in order to get out of doing something
- Difficulties hearing
- Demand avoidance
- Behavioural difficulties
- Avoidance of social situations and friendships
- Getting words mixed up or mispronounced
- Difficulties in recalling/remember words
- Attention difficulties
- Not attaining the recommended learning target for her age (in months, not year group)
- Potential sensory issues
Assessments and Identifying DLD
We spoke at length with the school, who were (and always have been) amazing and monitored her progress with the toolkit that was available to us with the school… We weren’t making progress. We needed more insight.
We arranged for Libby Hill of Small Talk Speech & Language Therapy to assess Ridley. She used a series of assessments, and as soon as she turned 5 years old Ridley was diagnosed with Developmental Language Disorder (children need to be age 5 or older to receive a diagnosis of DLD).
The Importance of a Diagnosis
So many people call a diagnosis ‘a label’ but it absolutely isn’t. Here are the benefits of getting a quality assessment and diagnosis:
- Getting a diagnosis is SO very important for a person’s identity and Ridley has benefited enormously by understanding her differences
- Without a clinical diagnosis children will get a moral diagnosis, and are more likely to be ‘written off’ by society as a naughty child
- Whilst you don’t need a diagnosis to get support, it undoubtedly makes it easier if you know what is going on. This leads to more support and less judgment (I appreciate there are still too many exceptions to that rule!)
An update from Chrissa in January 2025…
Now Ridley is 10…
I stumbled upon this blog recently and realised it’s been a while since we tended to it, although we have been checking in with our lovely community in other ways (Ridley even did a Facebook Live with us to mark DLD Awareness Day in 2024 – you can watch it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TDA586iN4rw). Nonetheless, I wanted to give you an update as I’m confident we can share a story of positivity and hope for others.
As I’ve explained before, we didn’t know what DLD was when Ridley was diagnosed at age 5. One of the most instrumental parts of our journey was the joint learning we did with Ridley’s teachers and keyworkers – it made a huge difference to those early months of discovering how her DLD presented and the knock-on effect was we were able to put forward a strong case for her EHCP.
Fast forward to 2025. Ridley has been in receipt of weekly Speech & Language therapy for her DLD for years now, and I firmly believe her understanding of communication and emotions far exceeds what is expected of other children her age. Does it mean she can execute it? Absolutely not, she’s 10! But she has a fantastic understanding and feels confident that she can self-advocate when things get tough. She also has a one-to-one TA who has had full training in DLD (and Ridley’s other presentations) funded to support her throughout the day, not just in structured learning time but playtime, too. Ridley also partakes in group work that is designed and carried out by a Speech and Language Therapist. All of this has helped her tremendously.
The light and shade of it all
Despite things looking really positive right now for Ridley, she has had a tough time of it in recent years including a fixed-term exclusion from school which affected her confidence and self-esteem enormously. She has, though, landed in the lap of a tremendous, and very experienced, year 6 teacher this year and has come on leaps and bounds. I have published reels about the way he is helping her, and she speaks very highly of him – which is a huge compliment given she is a ‘very honest child’ (her words!).
Currently she is working towards the government expectations for children her age, we are delighted at that, and she’s finally feeling confident enough to join in with full class tasks including SAT mocks! Something that is making her feel really good about herself.
She has started an 18-month transition to senior school, and will be soon partaking in group work at the senior school she has chosen as we move through her final year in primary, this is vital to her success at senior school.
Will a mainstream senior school be the most suitable provision? We never thought it would, if I’m completely honest. We thought she would need a specialist SLCN-based school – but that doesn’t exist locally. So, taking this into account along with her views of wanting to be in the same senior school as her siblings, we have committed to making this happen for her – she is willing to give it her all, and so are we!
Our top tip
The best thing we ever did was to get that detailed diagnostic report from SmallTalk Speech and Language therapy. That led to the brilliantly specified and quantified provision in her EHCP, that we have continued to fight to maintain (everything is a battle!). We know, from research, that with specific and targeted support children with DLD will see a positive impact; and Ridley has shown that this is true.
The first step is learning about DLD (parents and teachers, alike), then take it from there. To start your learning about DLD – join us at our webinar on 13 February: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/1001260165107
